Thug Jail Brother (Part 44)
MEMO TO SELF: What do you do when a friend goes silent?

It’s been three and a half months since all the shit in my life started and yes, I am in counseling. I have been working through a lot and I understand me just a little better but, I am still me Jason Alexander. Lora Michel’s had a miscarriage, Malek got piad on hundred grand, Malek took a blood test and it came back negative, they are thinking that the first test gave a false positive; it is way too complicated to explain. Malek has to go back in a few days for another blood test and we should know if he is in the clear. Ms. Sheba says that Malek then dodged another bullet, but Malek says it was though prayer and fasting that he was healed and I just say amen. Malek and Lady Moe are spending a lot more time together and that is kewl with me. I think I may be finally letting him go, just a little but that is better than before.  Yes, I still love Malek and yes, he is living we me again and yes, we make love every now and then and yes I hear you calling me stupid. But, have I ever given a damn what you think of me or what I should do, hell to the nawh. I don’t mine sharing him with Lady Moe; after all he is on the DL and if I am right that’s what DL brothers do.  Lady Moe still thinks he is straight what a damn fool, what is she thinking, he’s over here baking cookies. Some women see thing and choose to ignore them, well with that said, I guess some men do the same thing.  I told you my ass is in therapy and for all you nosey ass people, I have not spoken to Ahmad since the day I found out he has a wife and kids. To be exact, it has been three months, fourteen days and thirteen hours, since I have seen his black ass.

Today is Friday the thirteenth and I wonder what kind of shit it‘s going to stirrup. I am at the Penn Relays, the oldest and largest track and field competition in the United States, hosted annually by the University of Pennsylvania at Franklin Field in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. It regularly attracts more than 15,000 participants and over 100,000 people will be in attendance. Ain’t nothing like watching those brothers all suited up running around the track field, with those big asses and baseball bats and balls, all squowse up in those tiny little skin tight suits.  I’m not sure if everyone is here for the Penn Rely because it is also the annual Philadelphia Black Gay Pride (PBGP) celebration. The pride celebration is for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender African-Americans LGBT people, black LGBT prides in major cities throughout the country. So if you are DL tell your wife you are going to the Penn Relay and pray she is not reading this. My boy Taye and Lil Z met me here, we have a suite in the JWM and of course this is a business expense for me.  The Prophet and Ms. Sheba will arrive on tomorrow and he will perform at several of the LGBT events. I left Malek with the Tramp Lady Moe, but she keep telling me that she is saving herself for marriage. Malek may be a crowbar to get up in that stuff, cause if she is telling the truth, those legs be shut tighter than Fort Knox.

I have been hanging out with Taye and Lil Z and boy we have been having fun and I be hearing Taye and Lil Z across the room making noise at night.  I am so jealous, just think I could have had Lil Z but I ended up with Malek. But, I am happy for Taye and I am happy that he is happy, that boy puts such a smile on his face and I did not know he had so many teeth in his mouth. I am about to meet Taye and Lil Z now, we are going clubbing and I might get lucky at the club. We are going to club Zulu; it is a mixed gay and straight crowd. There is Taye and Lil Z, sup Taye and how are you Lil Z. Taye say so, no date tonight, you know I have been single all week. Malek may pop his happy ass here with Lady Moe and act a fool. You know his ass will be trying to do a three way, don’t go that way at all, never have and never will. We get up in the club and Taye and Lil Z leave me standing at the bar.  While I am standing there someone tap me on my shoulder, I sure don’t feel like putting up with some ugly ass fool tonight. I turn and who is standing in my face, Ahmad.  My legs are about to give out, my whole body is shaking and my mouth can’t form words.  Please lawd, let Taye and Lil Z  walk up right now, I blink three times and no Taye or Lil Z.

Ahmad say, how is my baby doing, I am not sure; I guess you have to call home and find that out. Oh man that was cold, Jason why did you run off on me? Do you really have to ask that Ahmad? I can only assume why you left because you would never let me explain. Ahmad I am tired of people explaining things, everybody got a story and I am about sick of it. I understand Jason, but we should have been able to talk about it. It is not that serious, can we talk now; I thought that is what we were doing. Bartender can I get a triple top shelf Vodka, Ahmad say I will have the same. He pulls out a hundred dollar bill and says keep the change. Finally Taye and Lil Z are heading this way and all they can see is Ahmad’s back. I say Taye this is Ahmad, boy his face drop like he just turned eighty, Lil Z jumped in because Taye could not talk. He said I am Lil Z and it’s nice to meet you. Ahmad say so Jay can we please go some place quiet and talk, I said sure. To be honest, I was about to jump up on him and take his clothes off and lay my ass across the bar. But, I am not supposed to do that after all I am in therapy and I am working through some issues. Breath, count to ten, think with my head, not that one Jason the one on your shoulders. Shit this stuff is not working, that brother needs to be giving me a refund. What you have in mind, Ahmad says there is a park across the street, we can grab a coffee and sit there if you want to. Well, I am not supposed to be running from my issues, I am supposed to deal with them. I want to deal with them but, please help me deal with them with my clothes on.

I tell Ahmad that we can do that, Taye says do I need to go with you, I say that will not be necessary, leave you cell phone on.  I will meet you guys back at the room later, Taye gives me a hug and whisper in my ear, hoe your ass is going to be naked in a minute. I fall out laughing and we walk out of the club and pickup two coffees. We walk to the park and we find a quiet spot in a sort of secluded area of the park and we sit on the bench. He starts out by saying Jason, I love you man, more than I have anyone else, I say including your wife. Jason, let me explain, Beverly Michelle is my ex-wife and yes she knows that I am gay, but for an extra hundred grand a year she covers for me. I was in time man; I have a lot to lose if I move to quick Jay.  From the first time we had sex I knew that I wanted to be with you, I knew that you where special. I want to slow walk thing because we had all ready connect sexually. I wanted you to fall in love with me before we had sex again.  I wanted to be special and not just another fuck, I love you man and I am willing to wait for you. But understand I can’t wait forever; damn there I go jumping to conclusion and not hearing people out. Ahmad what was I suppose to think when I am introduced to some one by you saying this is my wife.

I understand fully, but lets put that behind us, we need a fresh start.  What I need to know from you, are you willing, to try this again? I look him in the eyes and I see tears welling up in his eyes and I say of course I am. He pulls me unto him and gives me a kiss right on the mouth. Ahmad says, I love you boy, do you love me and I hastate and he says you will in time trust me. He asks if he can walk me back to my room and I say sure, as we walk he ask how is Malek. I say he is ok, but when I am with you I really do not want to talk about him. As we get to my room I invite him in, I tell him that I want him right now and he says lets go all the way tonight. Before I know it our clothes are off right at the door. He ask where is your room, I point to the other side of the suite. He picks me up in his arms while I am but naked and takes to the room and lay me on the bed. It is like he is carrying his bride into the honeymoon suite. He, lies on top of me and are bats are banging, I feel that monster climbing up my stomach. Ahmad asks for a condom and I reach in the draw and get on. He grabs some lube and he parts the red sea and greases it up. Ahmad says Jay I am going to make love to you baby and I am going to do it nice and slow. Just then my cell phone goes off, and I am paying it no attention, then it rings four more times. I say let me get this; it is probably Taye making sure I am ok and I don’t want them to worry. I answer the phone and it’s The Prophet and I can barley make out what he is saying. He is crying like a grown man shouldn’t, I say what’s wrong Prophet? He says Ms. Sheba; this boy is crying a cry of pain and agony. I scream no and Ahmad run out of the room and says what’s wrong Jay what’s wrong. I collapse in his arms and all I can say is no not Ms. Sheba and tears run down my face and I am trembling. I tell The Prophet that I am on my way.

To Be Continued…

Malek Ariel, aka MA

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